Well Droopy Swingers

The Middle Passage

West Coast correspondent Skywalker sends this tip, that the Trinidadian players have been promised barrels of rum should they defeat their opponents this afternoon. Their opponents are, of course, the English British Knights -- a match that every news organization on the planet has termed the C.L.R. James Memorial Cup. The news that Dwight Yorke will be out 'til 4am, drunk and partying with globe-breasted blondes is no news at all -- the rum can only help. But this report conflicts with, erm, conflicting reports that the "winner" of the match (colonizer or colonized) will be presented with an autographed copy of A House for Mr. Biswas, by its author V.S. Naipaul. You know, for those who haven't gotten around to reading it yet.

Oi, BECKHAM, I'm talking to you.